Names Roofus Moonshiner. Yesterday, I was laying on the couch when I heard Daddy open refrigerator. I jumped up immediately. Could've been cheese. Could've been chicken. Could've been a life-changin' opportunity. Turns out he grabbed a bottle of water. I stared at him like he'd just betrayed the family. All that excitement for WATER? I walked outsi
Food. You know, I just couldn't stop thinking about it. Yeah. So, yeah. So, you know, I went to the fridge and I opened up the meat drawer. You know what the meat drawer is, right? Yeah. What was in there? Well, I'll tell you what was in there. You know that bacon that's like maple? It's got maple flavor. The maple kind, yeah? Yeah, so. Yeah. I too
Bite me. Release. Bite me to death. Release. Confess. Sit. I gotta poop. Okay, open the cage door. Into the cage. Close the door. Come out. Close the door. Close it. Get the soccer ball. Slam dunk. Come on, bad boy. Put it back. Get in bed. Get on the table. Sit. Shy. Hands down. Crawl. Head down. Stand up. Bow. Sit. Attention. Salute. Time out. Ge
Hey! Bye. I'm going. That's it. Come on. You've got a bad attitude. Oh! Absolutely not. No, no, no. Walking. She's alright. She just doesn't want to leave. It's ridiculous. Come on. Hello! Do you mind if I say hello to your dog? Ohh! Oh, she didn't like that. Here you go.
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